Wednesday, June 30, 2004
Do you give money to beggars?
I do not give money to beggars as a matter of principle. I have always believed that anyone who can’t work to support themselves doesn’t deserve to get it free. I’ve lately come to believe that giving money to beggars is not just a bad idea, it’s plain evil. When you give money to a beggar, you’re destroying his will to support himself. A beggar who’s not had to support himself for a while no longer knows how to. He’s permanently disabled, using society as a crutch. And it only gets worse with time.
If you’ve ever walked down Brigade road with a fair skinned person and seen beggars swarming around him, you know how when you try to pry the beggars off, they tell you to stop hassling them so they may continue hassling your friend. Their dependence on the societal crutch has grown to the extent that they consider this their God-given right.
If you really care for their welfare, you should give your money or time to an organisation that helps put beggars back on their feet.
Except, in this case, this man wasn’t begging. He was trying to sell me a pack of ear-cleaning buds. I didn’t need it, I have a mostly unused pack at home. Then I saw the desperation on his face. He appealed in Hindi, said he had not eaten all day and if I could please buy one. But I didn’t want it! He appealed again. His desperation was soul stirring. I considered giving him some money and not taking his product, and then years of hardening against beggars kicked in: no giving money to beggars.
By then he lost interest in me and moved on, and I suddenly realised that he wasn’t begging. He was offering me something tangible in exchange for the money. Despite his desperation, he hadn’t stooped to begging. Should I have bought his product just to acknowledge his honour?
It was too late now. He was gone and I was very disturbed. I tried consoling myself with cold capitalistic reasoning, that if he wanted money, he should sell something people want to buy; but it didn’t work. Other distractions on the road put him out of my mind until I got to bed, and then I couldn’t sleep. I cried.
I’m reminded now of a passage from the Rough Guide book, First-Time Around the World:
Giving to beggars
You learn a lot about yourself when you travel, and being confronted by beggars twenty times a day will certainly flex the bend of that learning curve. It’s a vexing issue. You’re walking around with more more money than these beggars may ever possess, yet you’ll have to return in less than a week if you start handing it out as you may like. Even if you give money to five people a day, you might be refusing it to fifteen. Or you give some coins to a starving woman and her two starving children and you walk off thinking that you could have easily done so much more.
It’s common to feel callous — to the extent that you neglect to broach the subject with other travellers, including the ones you may be travelling with. Imaging you’re walking beside a traveller who is emotionally touched by a beggar when you’re not. They give and you don’t and when you continue walking there’s suddenly a little gap between you.
There’s no right way to approach it. Some people hand out tiny coins to everyone they encounter. Some never do, but may contribute to a charity that can (hopefully) better distribute the funds. Most fail to adopt any sort of policy and just end up giving when they can no longer refuse, when they need an emotional lift (giving can be extremely rewarding), or when they’ve just spent too much on a meal and feel the pangs of guilt. Some try, with a look, to figure out if the funds will be used for alcohol or milk, and if they will be helping support the truly bereft. For this reason, many people prefer to carry tiny gifts or snacks to hand out (although this is not always appreciated).
Begging can get aggravating at times, so aggravating that it’s possible to lose sight of the bigger picture: they are the ones with a life harder than anything you can imagine. Instead, you begin to feel like the victim. You feel like you’re viewed as nothing more than a walking money machine. You think: “I’m spending my money in your country, trying to learn about you, and if you don’t plan to get to know me in a genuine way, I’d really prefer to be left alone once in a while. Come to my country and see how you like getting hassled for change all day.” Needless to say, try your best to keep things in perspective.
—Doug Lansky
mmk — Jun 30, 2004 4:45:07 AM — # ↩
I dont know what I would have done.
oivas — Jun 30, 2004 4:47:29 AM — # ↩
With regards to your incident, I once had this shoe polish guy approach me and ask if I wanted to get my shoes polished... I was wearing sandals... Still, he wouldn't leave me alone; following me where I went and pleading... I got rid of him with a buck or two, I think... but I soon realised this was his modus operandi... He hung around a joggers park where very few people wore leather shoes. And a friend who got his shoes polished by the chap in question, told me that the ‘bugger’ didn’t know how to polish shoes anyway.
I have a few more incidents where I’ve been had by the wily… but now I think I’m a bit smarter and a bit more needy myself. I usually tend to have lesser hard cash than the beggars themselves.
amunix — Jun 30, 2004 5:06:55 AM — # ↩
I follow the same principle of now offering money to beggar - it is a major problem if you travel by a local train in Mumbai. Another instance that I have faced many-a-times is a person asking for some money so that he and his family (who is nearby) can return to their hometown (or whatever). I feel lost sometimes when such a situation arises - my response varies at times.
To comment on Jace's incident - I think a better way would be to buy some food for this guy, since he claimed he had not eaten for the whole day. This way you
* don't end up buying useless (or extra) stuff.
* don't feel guilty.
(though I am not sure what I would have done at that point in time.)
That reminds me of another tactic of extortion (yes, it is not begging) that exists in Mumbai - the transvestites' who try to extort money from you - and most people end up giving money because they put up a nasty show, and start cursing you instead. Their problem may be genuine - but there are better ways to solve it. I generally raise my voice and shoo them off, or else call for the Pandu nearby (you find lot of Pandus' on railway platforms' these days.)
ravi — Jun 30, 2004 5:29:29 AM — # ↩
Kiran Jonnalagadda — Jun 30, 2004 5:35:51 AM — # ↩
amunix — Jun 30, 2004 6:49:20 AM — # ↩
``I follow the same principle of NOT offering money to beggar..."
tariquesani — Jun 30, 2004 5:17:52 AM — # ↩
Yes! Giving money to beggars is Evil
ravi — Jun 30, 2004 5:31:22 AM — # ↩
No, not in Canada anyway. Beggars has no place in a socialist economy, like in Canada ...
I mostly used to ignore/walk away without a response, back in India. I'm still unsure what the 'right' thing to do is ...
kingsly — Jun 30, 2004 5:50:49 AM — # ↩
Last week I saw a kid selling one of those multi-colored "static" dusters on Kamaraj Road... he was hopping on one leg with the other limp/drooped like he was affected by polio... I was seriously considering buying one from him... when this other kid selling ear buds came from behind an auto and hit him on the back... next thing you know the first kid was sprinting after him and both legs were perfectly fine!
moccacino — Jun 30, 2004 5:56:39 AM — # ↩
I think, those who can afford to spend money on ciggarates, alcohol, pubs, concerts, clothes, shoes, novels, music CDs and other accessories shouldn't be affected by the authenticity of a beggar's misery. A ruppee or even a 100/- given to someone as poor as them on the roadsides is easily affordable. But thats just my opinion.
PS: You expressed your thoughts (confusion & all) v.well.
vinodkumarvc — Jun 30, 2004 7:15:37 AM — # ↩
the poet starts with how he wont 'give' to needy ppl. u feel this is one cold guy without a heart. towards the end, he speaks abt how there are innumerable hands, and how his pocket is so small. he cant give away money to one without giving to the other. so he prays to God tht He at least giv him a good heart tht can pray for all these needy ppl.
ya, this is a spiritual(?) solution to the problem.
irq2 — Jun 30, 2004 7:22:29 AM — # ↩
Kids - offer food, NEVER money
Man/Woman with kid in hand - NEVER
Old man/woman - NOT all the time
I usually try to judge from their appearance whether they are capable of earning on their own. Of course, there may be varied interpretations here; believe me, sometimes you *can* make good judgement.
Although there are several institutions in and around the city for them (from what I've heard, at least), they choose to beg as they actually "earn" more on the streets.
anomalizer — Jun 30, 2004 7:59:48 AM — # ↩
A bunch of em believe in have a kid perpetually. That way u get sympathy. When the kid grows up (read 5 years), the kid can work.
This so promotes popultaion explotion, child labour, and many complex issues that can only have a disastrous effect
clueless_rebel — Jun 30, 2004 7:24:02 AM — # ↩
i normally buy them food..if there isnt any small time eatery nearby then, a packet of biscuits or something..most of them accept the food, a few say "give me money instead"...
and for those of them who go around selling stuff, i think they should be applauded for the fact they havent turned to dishonest means to earn their living..and in our poverty stricken country, its not that easy for people to refuse ways to get "fast money", by hook or by crook...
one can always give away the item that they're selling if one has no use for them(though i'm not sure if cotton buds fits into this category), like dusting cloths, small toys, pens, pencils,agarbathis etc...
i completely agree that giving them money only encourages them to continue begging, instead of trying to find a way to earn their livlihood..
but on the other hand, who would employ the blind and physically handicapped beggars?? for them, begging seems like not only the last option but also the only option...
beerbal — Jun 30, 2004 7:24:14 AM — # ↩
Currently, my policy is to give till I run out of small change. I think I'll write about this soon.
contentedbloke — Jun 30, 2004 7:30:45 AM — # ↩
veenven — Jun 30, 2004 8:34:46 AM — # ↩
Food for kids. Feed kids in the station at least once a week, whether they beg or not.
Money for deformed/handicapped adults and aged.
Nothing for youngsters
Nothing for women who thrust their babies and an empty feeding bottle at youyr face (coz they didn't ask me before they had the baby and I refuse to take responsibility for it)
Buy stuff from people who seem to be earnest about selling things, give them a little extra, ask them to keep the change.
Always, always keep a pack of biscuits in the car.
shortindiangirl — Jun 30, 2004 5:04:52 PM — # ↩
I would feel cold if I had such a hard and fast policy on beggars. I would consider my own need for justification, rather than an appropriate modus operandi.
I tend to make my judgements on beggars in the circumstance. Sometimes, I don't have time to deal with it, and I move on, brushing them away. Other times, I talk to the person, buy them food if possible. Sometimes, I judge the beggar and act upon my judgement on how I think they would use anything I gave them.
But I feel guilty and I do not deny my guilt. I feel strongly that my own luck was a fluke of existential reality. I did not have to struggle to get myself educated. Work has come naturally to me as part of my education and my social norms. Money has come naturally to me as part of my lifestyle. Sure, I work hard and earn more money, prestige, knowledge etc. But I've never faced a situation where I was helpless.
My father gave me ane excercise to teach me the value of money in 4th std. He asked me to earn 1 rupee from someone that I did NOT know. I had few skills then, and found this excercise very difficult indeed. For the first three weeks, it was simply getting over the pride of offering to do something for someone that was either below my social norms, or something I didn't know much about. After that, it was finding something to do for someone. I picked flowers and rang the bell of a random aunty and offered them to her for 1 rupee. I told her my circumstance (in felt like I was breaking a rule). She gave me the rupee with some pity, but did not take the flowers. I had failed.
It felt awful to be a beggar. Even in this islolated financial excercise before I had time to develop much pride at age 9. And still I was backed by the dignity that this *was* indeed only an excercise for me.
But I remember the lesson well. I never told my father about my emotional findings because I wasn't sure I was going to pass his test, and I managed to get him to forget about it. And I finally re-rented my cycle to someone else for 1/2 hour for a rupee.
Anyway, this and just seeing how my PhD friends seem to go on to do their PhD's because there seems to be simply nothing better to do, and it's the best option... makes me realize how luck builds on luck. Life is relatively easy for me. And theories of poverty and capitalism are a far cry from reality. I make case specific judgements on giving to those less fortunate. And try not to judge the difference between luck and work in their lives.
amunix — Jul 1, 2004 3:47:13 AM — # ↩
Luck ? There is no such thing as `luck.' Its all about choices - though not necessarily made by you - but made by someone else for you. And every outcome is *only* determined by the choice you make - and nothing else.
shortindiangirl — Jul 1, 2004 4:05:28 AM — # ↩
The concept of "choices" is something I understand well, and yet, it is still a text book concept for me in many instances.
I call the choices that I have no control over my "luck". For example my mother's choice to not abort me, or to find an English medium school for me to go to. (And her choice, in turn depended on a number of choices that led her to the social and financial situation she was in when she was pregnant with me).
I call the choices *I* make, that I am not very aware of making, also "luck". We can call it "luck of circumstance". For example my choice to learn English and have an aptitude for it, or my choice to not pimp myself out for money. Some of these choices were made due to a "go with the flow" mentality. Because the choices made were ones that were accepted as the norm in my social reality.
And there are choices that are very difficult, with little to guide it. The choice of my black friend to send her children to a white school, where she knew that they would face difficulties & be ridiculed by being different, but where she knew that they would be educated well academically, is not a very easy choice. As is the choice EASIER for a Master's student to go on to do a PhD, over the carpenter in the union, struggling to feed himself, who cannot dream of taking enough years of no pay to do the Masters and then a PhD.
So:
1) Choices are not equal for people.
2) Nor is EVERYTHING a choice.
For example: it was not a choice made by ANYONE that I have an incurable skin condition that causes me daily problems.
And
3) Many choices are so interconnected, in such complex ways to other choices that seeing and sorting out the links could be an inhuman task.
Thus I make my case for the utility of this concept being more theoretical to me than practical.
snguru — Jul 10, 2004 6:42:39 AM — # ↩
Cud u explain this?
Anyway, this and just seeing how my PhD friends seem to go on to do their PhD's because there seems to be simply nothing better to do, and it's the best option... makes me realize how luck builds on luck
oivas — Jul 1, 2004 2:49:52 AM — # ↩
shradha — Jul 1, 2004 3:17:48 AM — # ↩
i remember feeling exactly the same way years ago on a late evening, when a very well-dressed old gentleman cleaned the windows of our car at a red-light crossing. i couldnt stop thinking about the possibility of his ungrateful son and wicked daughter-in-law driving him out of their house late at night. the guilt of not being able to do anything for him haunted me for days and weeks till it gradually faded away...till i read ur post.
as a rule, i dont give money to beggars and now that i think of it, have never offered them food either. (well, this was all back in india when i was fully dependant on my parents financially. in japan, u don't have beggars.) i perhaps owe a lot of my thoughts on the matter to the scene in kamal hassan's silent movie, 'Pushpak', where the beggar actually shows off having more money than kamal hassan himself! i think it reflects reality to a very large extent but am sure there r exceptions as well (such as the one i mentioned about earlier, u wasn't a beggar but was providing me with services that i didn't need).
*sigh* how i wish it was easier to make out the people in 'real' need than the farce ones and make correct yet prompt decisions...
shortindiangirl — Jul 1, 2004 4:17:26 AM — # ↩
During my trips home, another question I've pondered is this:
1) Which is better ? Begging or asking for / expecting bribes ?
I think (and still thinking) that I prefer to begging. From a "work" standpoint, it's more bang for the buck. I mean, those getting a bribe are usually getting paid for the work. And it's usually something that is fair in that other people doing comparable work are designated the same amount. So the bribe is an unfair extra. Whereas, the emotional show (if it is a show at all) needed for begging, the lowering of dignity (whether voluntary or forced), and the high rate of failure makes begging appear to me the more noble of the two.
It's just one more factor for me to consider (when I have time to consider) with a beggar's plea.
puremeteor — Jul 1, 2004 7:24:31 AM — # ↩
I found this article today which makes interesting reading.
My personal take on the subject is that if a person is either too old or disabled (lost both legs or lost both hands), I would be inclined to give him/her some money. Let's face it, there is hardly any support system in India.
It also reminds me of and incident when my Uncle's boss (an Arab) was visiting India. Whenever the car stopped at the traffic lights etc. he would be swarmed by beggars. This guy would just randomly pick a note from his pocket and give it to them. So one guy got 50 dollars, another guy got 10 and so on. Unfortunately for one guy, he ran out of foreign currency and he started giving out Indian coins. One beggar got a 50 paise coin. He was so pissed off with that that he threw it back at the Arab!!
dhempe — Jul 1, 2004 7:44:34 AM — # ↩
Heh.. that story makes interesting reading.. :) once I was hounded at the Surat railway station by some beggars too for helping a poor deprieved soul..
bloggolb — Jul 1, 2004 9:23:34 AM — # ↩
But check this out once with someone.
truptee — Jul 1, 2004 2:00:16 PM — # ↩
Headlines in today's (1st July'2004): "BHIKARI BONANZA"
There's a picture of a man.. a close up.. saying This man has a flat in Virar, bank deposits and investments in companies. WHo gave him the money? YOU DID!! He begs at signals between Khar and Bandra.
That's Mumbai. And that's about a beggar. What you wrote was very touching. It stirred something inside me too.. similar experiences have been lived here too.. such things manage to disturb me too..
And yes. Youw ere right. The guy was not begging.. even more disturbing.
But soon.. distractions take over.. and this too passes..
Life's like that. But hey.. keep the flame burning..
Anonymous — Jul 5, 2004 8:00:30 AM — # ↩
Didn't know that emotional and sensitive part of you Jace.
True, beggars are always problem and I have a "policy" too. But some incident in my own life made me rethink too.
There was this salesman desperate to make a sale. Found out they wouldn't admit his pregnant wife in a hospital without money. Well I bought his pitch, wrote a check and visited the said hospital. The story was true...
The policy remains unchanged, but the question remains.
Amol Hatwar